“Conditions are always neutral. They seem either sad or happy depending on the sad or happy attitudes of the mind.”
Paramhansa Yogananda
“The cause of my irritation is not in this person but in me.”
Anthony de Mello, The Way to Love
Events, occurrences, interactions are all just stuff. Stuff is what most of our lives consist of. Stuff can be a phone call, an email response (or non response), an interaction with a passerby, a comment from another, an article we read, or a post on an unknown blog that few, if any, read.
One of the things I’ve learned is that stuff happens. If you really look at it, it’s just stuff. However since we hate mystery so we make up a story about it. Usually we’re the hero or victim of our story as they’re two sides of the same coin. We get angry and offended. But if we really look at it, it’s just stuff, something that happened. is It’s our reaction and story that makes it good or bad.
The offensive person or event is doing what they’re doing. They’re probably not trying to aggravate us. They’re just trying to get through their day.
Whenever a trigger like this occurs, I try – and emphasis is on try as I’m not always successful – to take a breath, step back a bit and remember that this is another human. They have their lives and stories that I don’t know. I try to give them a break that I would hope they give me.
“All conflict is between you and you”
Dr. Rodney E. Donaldson
